BLOGGER TEMPLATES AND TWITTER BACKGROUNDS
Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts

Saturday, 29 June 2013

My Confession

Hi guys, I am back, I know at this moment  normally I will say 'It has been like several months from my last entry', I know this sentence seems to appear in all of my entries though it's still the fact, I just can't help it.

Anyway, what I wanna tell in this post is as the title of the post named, which is a post regarding my confession to my one long lost friend. If you are in my Facebook friend lists you might have noticed that I had posted  a status recently about 

' I personally think that the act of people expressing their emotional thoughts/critisms of others who irritate/frustrate them is an immature way of living'.

Yes, it's true that's what I sincerely currently feel but for those who followed my blog few years back then could have thought this is a laughter or just irony because I wrote a post on how I hate someone 3 years ago. Well, this is why I am here writing this post as my confession to that person involved in my related old entry.

Once I wrote how the related person affected my life how annoying I felt how irritated she was how and how and so and even saying she's just a nightmare of mine *well that post I already deleted long ago, you not gonna get the chance to read it*. At that time you know I seldom logged in to check my blog and stuffs while I rather spent my time with other things that I'm more potential of.. When I looked back to it after several weeks I was so surprised because she actually was a reader of mine and she read it and left me a comment!

Well can you imagine how a person suppose to react at that time when you just got noticed the person that you don't like * p/s:at that time* is actually an invisible reader of you? However, I didn't give too much of thoughts I also forgot how I reacted maybe I just ignored and hypnotized myself saying that I didn't do anything wrong that's how I truly feel after all.. 

But for all I had taken that happened, I realized writing about others' bad or criticizing about others' shorts in public isn't a good way of living. It not just killing people by words but also hurting people with all your unoptimistic angle of thinking. It had even became a totally black spot of my growth for all these years. I wanted to do something indeed, Idk, at that time I even started to stalk back to look back to her but I just can't because I just can't find any public page that owned by her after how many 1000x I googled her through my search engine. 

Well, life is always out of your expectation. Few days before, when I was still not around the country I just by chance saw her fb profile win my notification about her commented at my brother's status which the same to me not so earlier ago. What the first thought in my mind is, Ok right, I finally found her. 

After almost 2 weeks of thinking, I finally made my decision to personal message her. Gosh, I could have ignore and ignore her, because after all we may never ever meet each other again or having mutual friends in the social circle but no I didn't at last I chose to apologize to her. I even told her I was so sorry about my act of writing that of her in a public page, well I also so sad of myself for all the hurts I could have brought to her. For all I need is just she can accept it, well treating me as friend or not will be talking later, at least for my immature act of youth I would call it. One thing of her was right in her comment at that time which I would never deny is that as friend, as we were really once a friend, we should have told her about her inappropriate acts or our discomfort feelings instead of badmouthing in the back like this. This is also the same as robbing away her chance to be a better person, this is my fault. Besides, she might have changed and no longer like that as we were separated I could not know and how could I kill her changes simply like that? Well I am really sorry about that.

However, I'm still the lucky one. She replied me at the same night I personal messaged her, she meant all the pasts are passed, we should look forward. Yes, she forgive that and hoping we're still friend after all;)

Guys, this is a good example telling us nothing is ever too late. If you have done something which you think you were so wrong due to your past immature-nes just go ahead and grab your chance now, when you're still holding it. Always remember, the bravest person is the one who able to admit, to make changes to their past flaws.

Lastly, wish you all the best to whoever willing to step forward to make the changes. Good day :)

Monday, 22 April 2013

给朋友的一段话


在这2013年里,我终于完成了我人生的第一个学士学位 Degree (Hons)。可现在可是矛盾时期,忙的时候总希望早点毕业;完成了,落得两袖清风,却觉得不安,犹如即将脱落的枯叶,不知何去何从。。。

在我这一生,不管在人生的哪个转折点,我都觉得上天对我不薄,对我十分眷顾。

第一,我很幸运出生在这个家庭,‘钟’ 氏一族。虽然我不是什么大富大贵,可我有位很了不起的公公,一位很令人敬佩的婆婆,成就了我们令人称赞的家教。这一定是我前世修来的福。

第二,在我从中学毕业以来,糊里糊涂中,选着了Taylor's开始我的大学先修班,当中我才知道原来那是间名誉如此好的大学,在那毕业的学生往往都比其他学校毕业生多了大半的机会。而我选择的课程虽然很新,不比A Level 有名,可是却是操控于University of Melbourne, 那艰辛忙碌的课程,让我比别人多了一份面对大众启齿的勇气,一分刻苦耐劳的恒心。

第三,先修班毕业了,糊里糊涂中选着了International Medical University, 和 medical biotechnology这个课程。。事实这真的很糊涂,为什么是IMU?*当初觉得这学校很烂*, 只因学费比较便宜,而且课程无需出国就能完成;可是在参与了这学校后才知道,这是一所无比有名誉的学校,马来西亚第一所私立医药学院,拥有二十二年医药领域经验,专业出产无数的医生,牙医,药剂师 还有其他医药领域的研究人员比如说我。。。许多人还不知道,IMU 有许多卧虎长龙。。不管是讲师,大马与邻国有名专业人士*不说与某某公立比较*;学生,超有能力的。。不说IMU 的水平比大多数私立与公立的大学来的高来的严格,许多的学生还能够一直保持4.0 cgpa, 还有的医科学生做double degree, 或完成了engineering degree 又来个 mbbs (医科学士,至少五年),我的妈呀,听见我都快疯了。。。hmm。。有点离题了。。其实要说的是,我还没正式掏过父母或自己的钱来给这个学士的学费。。。ptptn 借了我一点钱, 学校merit award 又给了我30% discount,ptptn的钱已可以付完我的学费。。。这真的是糊里糊涂中上天给我的眷顾。。。

第四,在这三年里,生活有起有落。。不想再多说那是什么。。但之后我改变了许多。。如那位好友 C 所说的:没有昨天的你,没有今天的我。 昨天的我,单纯快乐信任相信天真无知;在落过后的我,承受得起更成熟开阔忠于自己该快乐就快乐给别人机会等于给自己机会,感激所经历的的一切,不然不会成就今日的我,一个我更喜欢的我,一个更独立的我,更坚强的我:)在我最落寞的时候,上天给了我一道难得一见的双彩虹,两座彩虹形成一座桥而我却在哪桥下穿过。。这真是亲眼所见过的,告诉着我别灰心,别难过,雨后总会天晴,总会出现彩虹,你会好起来的。。。也如朋友j所说:感谢那时的你,让我成长了。。
也明白了,在这世上,每个人都会经历挫折落寞。。只在于时机。。

致所有和我一样承受过挫折落寞的朋友,时机到了,不要后悔埋怨憎恨他,要去承受。。。感激他让你成长了,让你有一回有味的人生。要记得,做人总要‘信’,再难过的日子,走着走着就会到了将来。。犹如今早报纸对黄桐的新书而言:‘人生就如茶叶蛋,有裂痕才入味’ 和 ‘熬过了,将来就是属于你的’。。

p/s:不好意思还是插了一张自恋照:$

Regards,
Nicole

Wednesday, 12 December 2012

Dark sides

                  It has been a very long time since the last time I entered my blog and updated it. I have been always thinking whether to continue running it, if yes, what types of blog I want it to be? Fashion? Food? Skin Care? Lastly, I just want it to be my soul land for this moment at least, place that I can huge with, hide in. So it matches well with the theme of this blog, peace land. I also don't know do anyone reading my blog actually, so if yes please give me some responses, leave comments and say Hi to me?
                   There are so much up and falls happened during these gaps, time that I stopped my blog writes till now, more than that I could take, and slipped away before I could response in time. They are all sorts of mental, physical and psychological strugglings. I'm not gonna talk about it because things that had happened will never be changed...the only thing can be changed is how we take it. Since then I have totally another me. I used to be a quiet person except with my closest BFFs, undoubtedly I like peace environment. Now I'm still a quiet person and even with friends around me....I just find that like to see them, observe, and think more than talking. I appreciate them, I appreciate my family, especially my mum...she always give me the thoughts that her arms are the safest place ever for me...I am a tough, very tough and independent person in front of her....I didn't want to scare her indeed how much i wish i could cry in her arms...for even a second? I am stronger now, and colder...only coldness can sweep away the darkness, my pain and hurting, I must live with dignity.
                   After all these, the only thing that still left very clear in my mind and I still believe in is knowledge can change one's life. I want to get higher achievement in my education, so I will have better career. I want money, I like money,BUT I am not the person who letting hand out and asking parents for money, because I live with dignity, this has never been changed since I was still a child. I will never use my parents' money which earned with sweats and blood for my own desires. In turn, I pretty like the feelings of giving money to them instead of asking from them. This is me. I want money, I will earn it. I have been looking  for a stable job for a Uni student, that does not affect my studies. I have been thinking for many ways, but mostly not work. If anyone of you know, do inform me and I really do appreciate a lots but please no frauds. and so after all I want to have an online shop...I'm still thinking what to sell..something that can give me consistent profits and able to keep my business running. Anyhow, transportation fares to M'sia is expensive, so I ended up spending bunch for shopping...not earning:(((maybe if you know the cheapest and reliable ways please do inform me too. Maybe the I will show the goods that I shopped, comments are very welcome because your comments are part of my surveys although I don't expect I will get comments!!!!

:)

Sunday, 11 March 2012

I'm back.

hi, 大家好,好久不见,我回来了:) 已经好久好久没有进过来了,有点甚至连它的博皮是什么样子的我都已经不记得了:P真有点没良心厚! 也许你会好奇怎么没有了那么多posts?是因为我不想要了,但有留下一个,因为我舍不得。 短短几个月发生了好多事情,好像过了几千年一样,成熟了许多。 不知是年头的时间过得特别快,还是心理作用,一个sem也就要完了,还有一年就毕业了,是喜还是另一个烦恼的源头呢? 送你一张近来的照片吧。
喜欢,因为看起来象paint work。
see ya.